just a phone conversation i had with a friend.

i was on the phone today with a friend.  We were talking about how we were raised.  The yelling, screaming, the why did you tell your father that?   How that teaches you to lie.  Feeling like you are the cause of all the yelling in the house.  The walking on eggshells, never knowing if you set someone off.   i tell her with examples like this.  You can see how hard a time God had trying to show me He is Graceful, Lovingness, and Kind.

As she begins to share how she/girlfriend raises their daughter.   How her daughter responses to her and her girlfriend.  i hear God tell me  This is my  heart for my children.  I do not scold my children into repentance I love them there.  i  hear the wisdom behind their child that seeks to bring happiness to her parents.  That this 7-year-old child holds the keys.  To love and want to honor, and not disappoint her parents.  The Joy of a parent that delights in their  child.   The parent that does not seek to harm or belittle their child.   i see how God is working in their lives to show His love for His children.   i see this as His heart.   Not the theology but the LOVE Expressed.

i tell my friend what an Honor and Privilege she has to know that Mother Heart of God.  For who else but a parent can experience the Joy of children then a parent.   Wow i hear God say maybe i am not showing her that God loves her, maybe He is using her to show me that side of Him  that i can not fully understand myself.  For i do not have the Blessing of children.  (though He has used my cats to teach me a thing or two)   i know God used her to show me “come to me like the little children do”  Faith that I/God will never leave you nor forsake you.  Just as their daughter believes of her parents.

i tell this to my roommate and say i will not judge that which Is Only God’s to Judge.  i will Rejoice in seeing Father God work in and through their lives.  Thanking Him for all the lessons He teaches me through my friendship with them.

So there i guess i do have an opinion on the subject of gays.  my opinion is i will not judge, IT IS NOT MY JOB.   i will only seek to show the LOVE GOD SHOWS ME EVERYDAY.

Father may i be a disciple of  Your/Jesus’ Love.  For as YOUR SON said: I did not come into the world to judge but to SAVE.  Not to be SERVED but to SERVE.   Father may i have this heart. Father i ask that You show more and more of Your self to them.  That they may experience the Joy of calling YOU GOD FRIEND

Isaiah 55:10-11


Gods UnFailing Love.

i was just listening to Graham Cooke in truck on way home from mom’s.  He said ” God doesn’t test us to fail us. He tests us to deepen our Faith”.  This got me thinking.

i was just at mom’s house and as you can see not for long.  She likes to yell at me.  As i was at the door i heard ” it is easy to show love to those who love you”  my flesh wanted to leave, The Spirit said “Seek God for strength.”  Well my flesh won.  This is why i prayed that prayer on warring flesh, a post or two ago.

My mom apologized for yelling, and i said  “that’s ok i am going to live with you i better get use to it”.   Hum just realized wrong answer.  Forgive me Lord for i should speak life not death.

Now that i heard what Graham said i see the yelling of mom as testing.  How can God show He will give what is needed for situation if we do not ask Him and yield to His saying “seek God for strength to love those that aren’t so nice and friendly to you?

Father Prepare my heart to love my mother.  To honor her above myself.  i look at all that You could accomplish through our living together, but i am not helping in preparing the way.  i must look to only You Lord, and Pray as You told me to.  The preparing and reading of our hearts to move in together.

Loving someone i keep finding out is one of the hardest things to do.  i think that is why God has it as First and only True commandment.   Love God love others.   WE CAN’T WITHOUT GOD.   God knows this, and wants us to come to Him.  Wants us to Bless others with the Love He gives us.  i know for myself that if i do not seek God when with my mom, or others for that matter.  We both wind up feeling, not so  good about the visit.  When we know, that we know ,that we can’t do something.  Then we ask for help from one who does know.  This is humbling.  God Exalts the humble.

i want to bring Honor and Glory to You Lord.  Use me to show Your Love to her.  Strengthen me..

i just was  given a glimpse of why Jesus didn’t struggle as much as us with sin.  When you are loving people exalting them above yourself,  you have no time to get in trouble.  Thank You Jesus for showing us the Way, Truth, and Life.  Teach me to Love as You Loved.  Teach me to pick up my cross and carry it daily in Loving You.  May i not boast in my riches but rather in all my weakness’.  May i have them ever before me.  To Exalt You Lord.  Father may i have Wisdom to understand.

www.paid4u.TV  Father may we all reap greater harvests than this movie did. (multi-millions of people see)   We may not look at Mel Gibson and judge or condemn.  Father You Provided the money and creativity to bring forth Your message of Salvation and LOVE FOR MANKIND. Using modern-day media and Mel Gibson.   Praise God He is Worthy.